G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

G.I. JOE: The Rise of Cobra - Directed by Stephen Sommers, starring Channing Tatum, Dennis Quaid, Marlon Wayans, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Sienna Miller, and Christopher Eccleston - Rated PG-13

The Evil Kurgan only wants violence and action...and this movie has both in droves.




G.I. JOE: The Rise of the Cobra is one of the last big budget action movies of the summer and, if not taken seriously, can be quite enjoyable. The biggest part of the movie you should not take seriously is the plot. This is a movie based on a toy, after all. I don't want to go into pointless detail about the plot, so I'll keep it short. A new weapon technology ("nanomites," or little metal bugs that can destroy anything, much like in the recent The Day the Earth Stood Still remake) have been introduced to the world and two rival groups start to fight over their possession. Now add about $170 million in real and CG explosions and you have G.I. JOE.

I tried to keep my head out of this movie as much as possible because I went to see it just for the action. But I couldn't help but notice a few times that the future that this film takes place in is quite miserable and maybe not worth saving, even though all the characters seem oblivious to this. War is constant (which is true today), but it's less distinguishable who is fighting who. The soldiers of G.I. JOE certainly have an American swagger, but many of them are from different countries, making them more of a United Nations strike force. The war may be everlasting and ambiguous, but that hasn't stopped these future scientists from working hard on holograms. In the first twenty minutes of the film, it seems like every other character is being projected by hologram, a gimmick that grew pointless very quickly. I suppose that describes the world of this film the best: misery and death overshadowed by ambitious technology. I stopped thinking like this early on, though, because ninjas were fighting onscreen.

This brings me to the action. Director Stephen Sommers (The Mummy, Van Helsing) has found the best formula for the summer action movie: when the story becomes complicated or ridiculous, amp up the action. It worked for me. Anytime I was wondering why McCullen (aka Destro) had such a byzantine plan, there would be a fight scene between Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow (two ninjas who have been fighting each other since childhood). That was all I needed to forget about the problems with the story. The action is pretty good, for the most part. It's hectic, but it's not so fast that you can't tell what's going on. The CG (which I was worried about based on the previews) turned out to be decent, though some of the underwater battles and accelerator suit stuff looked goofy at times. I feel the need to point out that even though this movie is based on a series of toys, that doesn't mean it's aimed at small children. I thought a lot of the violence was pushing the rated R level; people getting stabbed in the face, heads exploding, and a huge body count.



The action is the main aspect of this film, but the filmmakers explored two other elements that helped this film out immensely. First, they made this a true ensemble film. No one character really stands out as the star. Sure, you have the notable characters of Duke, General Hawk, Cobra Commander, Ripcord, Baroness, etc. But I wouldn't say that any of them get much more screen time than the other. That is a blessing, since these characters would probably become annoying if in large doses. They are all one-note, but since they are all different notes, it balances out. The second element that makes this movie stand out is that they actually focused on character development. It's not profound or anything, but it was interesting to see a movie like this go to flashbacks from multiple perspectives to explain why some of these characters are holding grudges against each other. This makes the action mean something for a change. The ninja showdown is still cool even if I have no idea why they hate each other, but it's much better and I actually care who wins when I get information about each fighter through flashbacks.

I mentioned the ensemble aspect, so I should mention the actors as well. Actors in a movie like this really only need to make sure that they do not end up as jokes. I wasn't blown away by any of them, but none of the actors did a particularly bad job, either. The brightest point of the cast is Joseph Gordon-Levitt, who gets to ham it up with a great evil voice as Cobra Commander (I'm willing to bet that behind that oxygen mask, he had a huge smile on his face the whole time). The low point is Christopher Eccleston as Destro, but that's only because I found him annoying as the villain in the Gone in 60 Seconds remake, and he's playing pretty much the same character in this.



I haven't made any comparisons to the toys themselves or the cartoon series throughout this review because I didn't want to turn this into a fanboy comparison/rant and I was never a fan of the cartoon or toys anyway (I was a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles fan). But I did notice a few references for the fans that even I understood, like the mention of a "kung fu grip" and the line, "knowing is half the battle." I did watch this with someone who grew up with the toys and the cartoon and he seemed okay with the movie, though I'm sure there are some fanboys and "purists" out there who are busy denouncing this movie as a travesty on the internet message boards as you read this.

All in all, G.I. JOE is a fast paced action film that doesn't try to make a statement about war (if anything it glorifies it) and certainly tries to stay away from commentary on America, since the soldiers do not necessarily represent the USA in the film. In fact, if they had been completely American, this would have seemed like the live action version of Team America: World Police. It still kind of is, but that's not really a bad thing if you're in the mood for an action movie. And that's what G.I. JOE is: an unapologetic futuristic war movie that never lets you catch your breath, and that's fine by me.

Eric Harris - www.canneltoncritic.com

FILM REVIEW : G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)

Okay. So I actually saw this a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away... well, not really, but I did see the film before I started blogging. That counts, right?
Anyway, I saw this film last summer on a... Wednesday I believe (?) in a three-movie marathon with one of my friends. It was truly a day for film experiences: the delightful (500) Days of Summer, the bland but survivable Julie and Julia, and the insufferable G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra.
It should be noted that this review is partially adapted from my original review.

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)
 

I haven't seen as many 2009 films as I would have liked, but I can without a doubt say that G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra was the worst of the year
Let me start off by saying that this film is a complete waste of time and money. I absolutely hate this film and think that it's the worst of 2009. It is without a doubt one of the worst films I've ever seen and would give this film zero stars if I could.
 
This is the part of the review where I would describe the plot in detail, but unfortunately, there isn't one. It's basically a group of "good guys" (Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans, Rachel Nichols, Dennis Quaid) going against a terrorist group or something (Sienna Miller is a part of this group).

I'd bring up some things that I enjoyed about the film, but here's the thing: I DIDN'T LIKE ANYTHING ABOUT THE FILM!!! So, instead of doing that, I'll just express how bad everything was.

What's the deal with the writing? First off, there is no discernible plot within a twenty mile radius of the screenplay. How can we enjoy a film without an idea of what's actually going on? Secondly, the humor is poorly written. I found myself laughing at exactly zero percent of the jokes. Okay. You caught me. I laughed at all of the intended humor. Note: I was laughing AT the intended humor and not with it; very similar situation with one of last movie outings: Leap Year.

Now let's discuss the director Stephen Sommers. Stephen Sommers can't direct a film. There: I said what everyone else has already figured out. Honestly, this makes Kevin Greutert's handling of Saw VI seemingly comparable to Tarantino's work on Inglourious Basterds. His handling of the already nonsensical screenplay brings no life to the story, the action, or the characters.

And speaking of the characters, all of the acting in this film is about as convincing as Taylor Lautner's Jacob Black in The Twilight Saga: New Moon. Seriously. I've never thought too much of Channing Tatum as an actor. His performance as Duke really doesn't help make the case for any acting chops that may or may not be there. The performances everyone esle - Christopher Eccleston, Rachel Nichols, Sienna Miller, Marlon Wayans, and even the usually dependable Dennis Quaid - are pretty terrible, as well, but for me Tatum sticks out like a bad thumb.

I guess Joseph Gordon-Levitt escapes the situation unscathed. I mean, the guy is pretty awesome. With (500) Days of Summer released around the same time, as well as his upcoming turn in Christopher Nolan's Inception, I simply can't say anything bad about Mister Gordon-Levitt. And no: this isn't simply avoiding negative remarks because I like his other projects. He's actually alright in G.I. Joe.

Oh, and the quality of the action is poor. Very, very poor

So what do we have? An indistinguishable plot, poorly written humor, a guy who can't direct, a cast that basically fumbles through every scene, and lousy action sequences?

Sounds like last year's G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Not in any way, shape, or form recommended

Rating: 0 out of 10 stars


Photo Courtesy: Movie Moron

(Read Less...)

Julian Stark (pen name)<br />
<br />
Founder/Editor: Movies and Other Things<br />
<br />
http://julianstark-moviesandotherthings.blogspot.com

GI JOE: The Rise of Cobra

The time: the near future. A weapons manufacturer has developed a new kind of weapon, one involving nanotechnology. Missiles loaded with nanites (microscopic robots) are fired at the target; the nanites eat the target (or disassemble it at the molecular level), destroying it completely. The company has sold four of these warheads to NATO. But as NATO forces are transporting the missiles, the convoy is ambushed by a group bent on stealing the missiles. Fortunately, members an elite, secret international military unit arrive to save the day.

This sets up the plot of a slam-bang action movie that pulls out all the stops. The secret elite military unit, operating as a black-ops NATO unit (or maybe a UN force), is called the Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, better known by its acronym: G.I. JOE.

(You can stop groaning now.)

The two NATO soldiers who survived the ambush, both Americans, are introduced to the GI Joe unit, which consists of the best of the best of international military commandos. They have a secret base with all sorts of high-tech gadgets at their disposal, and they all have codenames.

The main plot of the movie has to do with the designer of the weapons, the head of the weapons manufacturer, who has his own secret agenda for using the weapons for his own nefarious purposes. He was behind the ambush of the NATO convoy, for instance, planning to secretly steal the weapons back while publicly berating NATO for their incompetence. Fortunately for him, he has a backup plan in the works, which brings the GI Joe unit into play, with the two newcomers (the two Americans) along for the ride because they are already involved.

The result is a wild ride, a perfect summer matinee for those who just want to sit back and be entertained. The various set pieces are a rollercoaster ride, the high point being the chase sequence in Paris. I almost said "car chase" as cars are the ones being chased... but they are chased by a few GI Joe operatives in ultra-high-tech powered armour that looks really really cool.

Okay, sure, movie is popcorn with plenty of cheese... but it's really good cheese on really good popcorn. The plot? Straightforward, but then in this kind of movie that's not unexpected. The visuals are amazing, and the action is top-notch.

Then there are the performances, starting with Christopher Eccleston (the ninth Doctor among other things) as the main villain. He chews up the scenery and goes back for seconds. As much as I liked him in Doctor Who, here he does a hilarious turn as the bad guy, and pulls it off well. In the hands of a lesser actor, the portrayal would have been simply corny, but with Eccleston, it goes way beyond that. He's one of the best things in the movie.

The only other cast member I immediately recognized was Dennis Quaid as General Hawk, commander of the GI JOE unit, and is perfect for the role. But the rest of the cast are an attractive bunch, and they play their assigned parts well, given what it is they are there to do. Of particular note is Joseph Gordon-Levitt (unrecognizable under his makeup) as Eccleston's secret partner, a mad-scientist type in the employ of the weapons company, who has his own agenda.

We also have Arnold Vosloo (from The Mummy) as one of the villains' main henchmen; it took me a while to place him, but he was fun to watch. And there are two very attractive female cast members, one on either side: Rachel Nichols is the GI Joe operative called Scarlett, and Sienna Miller is one of the villains' main operatives. Nichols was the green-skinned cadet in the sack with James Kirk in the recent Star Trek movie; Miller was the love interest in Stardust (not the living star, but the woman the main character had a crush on). Miller won a Razzie for Worst Supporting Actress for this one.

One thing I will admit here is that I am completely, totally unfamiliar with the source material. The characters are based on those from a GI Joe cartoon series from the mid-1980's and the comic book linked to the cartoon, both of which in turn are based upon a line of action figures that go way back to the mid 1960's. I never had the toys, I never watched the cartoon show, and I never read the comic book.

So, all the characters in the movie, well-known to fans of the franchise, were all new to me. Duke and Ripcord (the two new American recruits in this movie), Snake Eyes, Scarlett, The Baroness, Storm Shadow... all of them are here, but I had no idea who any of them were.

Not that it matters. The movie is total mindless fun. It also doesn't take itself too seriously. I've seen action movies that do take themselves seriously, and unless they are very well made and well played, they fall flat. This one never loses sight of its source material, fully realizing that it has more than its share of over-the-top silliness... then runs with it.

Overall, it's a fun ride. If one is in the mood for a mindless action movie, one could do a lot worse.

Last updated: 2010-04-09 19:18:56 by Xenon

G.I Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Love Beats Nanotechnology! General, she may be destroying Paris now, but four years ago we were engaged!

One word Review: GOOD

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra starts in 1641 with a small toy company named Hasbro selling arms to both sides and the French, who never double-deal, found out and slapped an iron mask on your face and locked you away forever. Today, your descendants are major toy dealers controlling 70% of all weapons produced around the world.  Now, just substitute “arms” for ‘toy” and you have the start of this movie based on the successful G.I. Joe toy soldiers. Like Transformers before it, the idea of blockbuster movies based on toys has been a challenge. The Hollywood solution has been to crank up the action and limit the storyline. G.I. Joe is one frenetic action movie, so much so that I had trouble taking my eyes off the screen to write down any thoughts going through my mind, not that there were many thoughts other than, “say, that’s a cool gun” or “she’s pretty hot in that outfit” or “how the heck do you build a huge military base under the arctic ice?”

The critical reaction to the Transformers sequel was bad enough to make the studio hold back on previews for G.I. Joe, feeling the advance reviews would again be negative and limit the box office. Instead, they previewed the movie to fans and hoped word of mouth would carry it to #1, which it did. The critics have been uniformly negative, claiming the effects are cheesy, the story non-existent and the dialogue stilted (as in, “The French are pretty upset” after the Eiffel Tower is destroyed). All this may be true, but who cares? Unlike the dismal Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen which made no effort to engage our heroes in the story, this movie is intensely personal and intimate, much like the Star Wars storyline where a whole universe hangs in the balance as father, son and daughter duke it out in special effects heaven.

Two things make this movie work: the premise of Scots controlling the arms trade for centuries, from the Man in the Iron Mask to the present day MARS corporation, run by a brogue-bragging Scot named McCullen, (Aye, you’re really thrown the caber there, lad!) and the tight personal ties between the good guys and the bad guys, a la Star Wars. Vader’s my dad! Leia’s my sister! I guess this is personal!

Sure the plot relies too much on a tracking beacon in the suitcase o’warheads and gadgets geared to sell toys, but hey, at least the money is on the screen. In reality, this is an adaptation of How the Scots Invented the Modern World: The True Story of How Western Europe's Poorest Nation Created Our World & Everything in It, with added explosions.

The Story

The story starts in 1641 with a McCullen in prison for dealing arms to both sides, pissing off the French and paying for it with an iron mask covering his face until the end of his days. This mask re-appears in the McCullen head office, as the latest descendent of clan McCullen selects Paris for his revenge. We learn that nano-technology is the future of warfare. Tiny nanomites can power bombs that eat metal, and live inside uber-soldiers, controlling their minds and repairing their bodies.  Four nanomite warheads, capable of destroying cities are transported from the mountain factory to NATO by the military when then are attacked by superior forces, lead by a dark-haired ninja named “the Countess”. They overpower the convoy and are about to steal the warheads when the Joes arrive and drive them off with their own superior weapons. Seems like there is the normal army with conventional weapons and these elite forces with all the cool stuff.

We also learn, in the heat of the battle that the Countess and Duke, one of the soldiers, know each other in an affectionate way. How do we know this? Oh, they hesitate when they have a shot and mutter each other’s name. Cut to the Joes HQ, deep under the desert. The warheads are safe, but McCullen appears holographically and activates the tracking beacon. Now the bad guys know the location and send out another team to steal the warheads again, lead by the Countess and another dude, Storm Shadow (the white ninja). We also meet the Joes, with a black ninja (Snake Eyes) a redhead (Scarlett) and a team lead (Heavy Duty) all under the command of Gen. Hawk. Backstories reveal the love affair between Duke and the Baroness and the death of her brother which drove them apart and the child ninja rivalry between the white and black ninjas and the death of their teacher which drove them apart.

From here on, we get an assault on G.I. Joe headquarters highlighted by a ninja battle and a catfight between the Countess and Scarlett. On to Paris where the first warhead is launched at the Eiffel tower after a chase through the streets with Joes in accelerator suits vs. the bad guy SUV with more weapons than an aircraft carrier. They escape but Duke halts the nanos from eating through Paris but gets captured for his efforts and taken to the secret lair of McCullen under the arctic ice. He re-activates the tracking beacon on the warhead suitcase so the Joes can find this secret base and we have an arctic assault by sub on the bad guys.

Of course, the bad guy behind McCullen is a psycho doctor who uses nanomites to create his uber-armies including the Countess (ah, now we know why she was so good before and now so bad). But she finally fights off the little mites because she loves Duke and saves him, they save the warheads, the base is destroyed and the bad guys captured. Ah, but the destruction of all these cities wasn’t the big plan. No, it was using nanomites to alter another bad guy to look like the President and replace him in the White House and thus, we end with the creation of Cobra and the bad guys in command of the sequel, I mean, the Oval Office.

Still with me? And these critics complained there was no story! I’ve just given the highlights, not even the real identity of the mad doctor with the weird breathing apparatus over his face.

The Genre

The action adaptation genre is a major driver of Hollywood, mostly as a risk management tactic, offsetting the millions needed to produce movies against a pre-sold audience. Marvel has created its own movie studio to produce spin-offs of Spider Man, Iron Man, etc. Disney leveraged the Pirates of the Caribbean thrill ride into three mega-hits. Hasbro already has a franchise with Transformers and now, G.I. Joe. Movies and toys are interchangeable these days, since the breakout success of Star Wars. It is hard not to see these movies as giant ads you pay good money to see so you can go to Toys R Us and pay some more.

I am sure Mattel is kicking itself for not bringing out an “Action Barbie” line, with Barbie kicking ass without breaking her nails. Hot Wheels should have rocket launchers and armor-plating. When will we have the Trivial Pursuit Squad vs. the Scrabble Maniacs? Battleship vs. Stratego? Twister vs. Snakes and Ladders? Think of all the great action figures they wasted in Toy Story! Mr. Potato Head could be a Sherlock Holmes detective! Slinky Dog could be on the police canine squad! Come on, Hollywood. There is a landscape of opportunity waiting to be harvested.

We need to prime audiences to support these mega-movies. Without lots of big action adaptations of things we already know and love, why, we’d have to go and see original epics with fresh stories and new characters! Why go to all that bother? I think Ken needs to join the SEALS and Barbie “accidentally” receives a nano-injection, turning her into a bad-ass ninja chick. Now we’re talking. I’d go see that, story or no story.

The Overall Quality

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra delivers exactly what it sets out to achieve. Stephen Sommers is an experienced director, with hits like The Mummy, Van Helsing and Deep Rising (check it out if you haven’t seen it). He keeps the action front and center, using the mask theme throughout the movie to keep some mysteries hidden. The number of characters and back story he juggles is impressive and he trashes Paris in delightful ways, including a comment by the Baroness about a pair of stylish shoes. The actors do their best to carve out something unique for each of their characters but mostly they are running like hell, pressing buttons and dodging explosions.

Sure, the effects are a bit stale (the nanomites dissolving metal looks like a few previous movies including the sand in The Mummy and the alien robot swarm in The Day the Earth Stood Still), but it was still effective in the crumbling Eiffel Tower scene. I give the filmmakers credit for their set pieces, the underwater assault on the arctic base is an epic battle. But the imagination level is only on par with others in this genre. How many funerals have you seen in the rain? How many heroes riding alone on a motorcycle? For what it wants to do, G.I Joe delivers.

Movie/Market Analysis

MarketBOB’s sentiment indicators, the GQS (Genre, Quality, Story) make G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra a BULL movie. It is the combination of the best efforts of giant corporations to leverage brand recognition to create an opening in our wallets. It works, because you get your money’s worth, you see the good guys win and you leave the theater “up”, as you climb into your car to drive home, looking down at the console for the rocket launcher switch or the pulse cannon trigger. Of course, there’s nothing on your console because you can’t volunteer to be part of the Joes, you have to be invited.

There is really only one comparison to make with G.I. Joe, and that is the first Transformers, in 2007. The market had risen over 10% since early March, 2007 and this movie opened in July and did great business, over $70 million in its opening weekend. I am sure G. I. Joe was green-lighted for production shortly after Transformers’ success.

(Read Less...)

GI JOE: The Rise Of Cobra OR Crap is the other half of the battle

GI JOE: The Rise of Cobra

Starring: Joseph Gordon Levitt, Marlin Wayans, Channing Tatum, Sienna Miller, Byung-Hun Lee, Ray Park, Dennis Quaid and Jonathan Pryce.

Director: Stephen Sommers

An elite military unit comprised of the best soldiers from multiple nations battles an arms dealer who has created warheads that contain nano-machines which will eat everything metal in there path.

GI JOE is based off the Hasbro action figure line/Cartoon made famous in the 80’s. The movie version of GI JOE has very little in common outside of the characters the relationships in the cartoon are not the same as in the rise of cobra (Duke and the Baroness are a former couple in the film.)

There is not much story here as the cartoons had better scripts; GI JOE has the worst CGI ever captured in a major studio release; all of it from start to finish is so bad that you can’t decide what is worse the pathetic script or the crappy visuals. The film is incomprehensibly dumb, poorly acted and the action scenes are beyond lame. Dennis Quaid as General Hawk the leader of GI JOE gives a performance that leaves you wondering if Hawk suffers from constipation or if Quaid realized partway through filming that he made a bad decision doing the film; and he is the best actor in the bunch.

The rise of cobra doesn’t even try to make sense or care if it does. Everything is just an excuse for a really bad CGI action scene. One example of stupidity Involves “The Doctor” who creates a procedure that will allow Zartan to physically change his bone structure, skin, hair and eye color; allowing him to look like anyone he wants to; however the doctor wears a wig and an eye patch from a horrible accident, This genius creates something that could fix himself but chooses not to use it. Another example is MARS industries (the front for Cobra) can create a warhead but then they have to steal them back rather than just create more for their lame plot on world domination with Zartan as president. There is also an underwater base that is the size of Rhode Island that has gone completely undetected, how good is GI JOE if this can be built without them knowing about it? Another issue I had was how everyone’s favorite character snake eyes has a black mouth? He is a ninja, he is wearing a mask, you should not see what looks like black plastic lips on a ninja.

For a movie based on Toys and a Cartoon there is little fun to be found here, it is plain to see why the studio did not want to pre-screen this, it is a 175 million dollar abomination.

Grade 1 Sniper Kitten

Sommers, What Have You Done To ‘G.I Joe’?!

My uncle really liked the G.I Joe animated series and action figures as a kid. He still has everything he collected from his childhood to this day, just in case he ever needs some extra money or just wants to revel in his past.

Somehow I believe that the net worth of those figurines will drop on eBay thanks to the new live-action movie G.I Joe: The Rise of Cobra. Cobra pretty much recaps the story of how the team of heroes came to be, and how team Cobra came into power. It tells the story, and badly, I must say. Stephen Sommers (the evil mastermind who did the Mummy and Scorpion movies) directs this action-crap in hope of topping Michael Bay. Although who can? Bay is the king of sex/action/garbage movies (Day After Tomorrow, I'm talking to you) and nobody in this day and age can beat him. Sommers attempt is a bit sad, actually. Could Sienna Miller walking slowly out of an automobile and frenching a Chinese guy be the next Megan Fox checking out the hood of Bumblebee? Long story short: no, it cannot.

Channing Tatum stars as Duke, the acting first sergeant of the "Joe" team.

Tatum delivers a new set of emotionless drama to Cobra; not the dancing emotionless drama he did in Step Up or the dreadful thirty seconds of being shot and looking depressed he worked oh-so-hard on in Public Enemies; no, a wholenew set! America needs to face that fact that Tatum simply cannot act. You've heard by now of his Chippendale's past, and that's where he really belongs. I'd much be happier seeing him on a billboard in Abercrombie and Fitch than on the big screen making me feel sad inside whenever I see him. Marlon Wayans also appears as Ripcord (his purpose really doesn't matter that much). Immediately,Joe is a joke. Hiring a Wayans in an action movie that I'm supposed to takeseriously?! (Note the emphases.) I guess to provide a little bit of comedy into the mixed-up cast. Surprisingly, it doesn't work. And if you didn't get that I was being sarcastic in that last sentence, G.I Joe is the movie for you.

Sienna Miller is eye candy as Baroness; Stephen Sommers' Megan Fox. I didn't take her role that seriously, I'm sorry. But I couldn't help myself. I think that Miller, who's starred in such great movies as Factory Girl and Layer Cake, is the only reason that I'm not writing this movie of as a whole. Sure, she pushes her, um, cleavage together and wears skin-tight leather throughout, but she brings life to her character. That's more than you can say for Tatum or Wayans. The other reason I'm not writing this off is because Joseph Gordon-Levitt stars as "The Doctor" or "Rex", whatever you want to call him. It's only in Joe that you realize that he's no longer the little rascal from Third Rock from the Sun. He's a fully-blossomed Keanu Reeves (which he so closely resembles in Cobra). I hope that he does more serious work than G.I Joe. And I'm not worrying, because he will.

G.I Joe: The Rise of Cobra is a messy Transformers with bad acting and an even worse storyline. Whatever credibility Paul Lovett, Stuart Beattie, David Elliot and Stephen Sommers previously had is al blissfully lost with his latest concoction. Take my advice and skip Rise of Cobra. This high-hope that movie studios have of creating the next Dark Knight is a laugh. That Cobra would even come relatively close.

1½ out of 5 stars

(Read Less...)

-Nick

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Premise

From toys to cartoons to comics to the big screen, G.I. Joe has made it at last. The threat is weapon that could destroy the world. The Joe have to keep the weapon out of enemy hands, take the enemy down, and do it all without the world even knowing they were there.


Review

The cartoon really did come to life. This wasn't science fiction, it was science fantasy and it was so much fun to watch. The gadgets would make James Bond jealous and the tech is stuff I really wished existed... to a certain extent. Some of that stuff needs to stay in fiction.

Of course, my fav character was Snake Eyes (have his sword sitting on top of the china cabinet) and of course, they didn't show him nearly enough. Then again, they could have made the whole movie about him and it probably wouldn't be enough. :D

This movie isn't wall-to-wall action, even though the action sequences are well done. You get a pretty good definition of all the major players... via flashbacks. Yup, this movie is flashback heavy. Lots and lots. They could put Highlander to shame. I'm not complaining about that too much since you get back story without the characters actually angsting about it, well not out loud.

I do however have some complaints... Hey, I'm a fan of the cartoon (comics off and on), so you knew there would be some complaining.

#1 - Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow don't have nearly enough fight scenes... okay, that's not the real complaint. It is a complaint but not the real one. The real complaint is that Ray Park had better fight choreography in Episode One than in GI Joe. It didn't look real. And by "real", I mean it didn't look like they were actually fighting so much as going through the mapped out routine. Yes that is what they are doing but in a lot of martial arts movies you can see how someone would get seriously hurt if they weren't timing and following a pre-set course. Maybe it was just because they weren't moving fast enough, but I just wasn't "feeling" it. Ray Park needed to channel his inner Darth Maul a little more.

#2 - I don't like what they did to the Baroness. Not the actress. She was great. Sure she didn't have the accent (I missed that) but she did a good job at playing an evil bitch. Kudos. I don't like what the script writers did to her. Her poor back story. *sigh*

#3 - Yet again the previews-makers screwed up by showing a pivotal point of the movie in the trailers. When that part of the movie showed up, I was mentally doing the "get on with it" motion because I knew already (thanks to the trailers) what would happen.

Favorite line from the movie: "He never gives up." <- Priceless. You have to go see the movie to find out why. 

Parental warnings: Not many to give. It's kind of graphic on the violence. Not Braveheart / Saw graphic but still up there. Mild cursing -- you'd hear worse watching prime time network television. Tight outfits on the women in the movie but nothing revealing or revealed.

PS - There's nothing at the end of the credits.

I give this a "pass the time" rating. It's something fun to watch with just the right mixture of comedy and action. You know there will be a sequel -- with a title like "Rise of Cobra" there has to be -- and it'll be interesting to see what they do. I will be seeing it again just because the hubby wants to see it and he'll be back from Iraq in a few weeks.

Recommendations: Star Trek (2009), Avatar, 300

D. Renee Bagby<br />
Building New Realms of Passion<br />
http://dreneebagby.com

GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra

A disaster-in-the-making. That's what "GI Joe" was supposed to be.

First came word that Stephen Sommers, auteur of the mediocre "Mummy" flicks and the hideous "Van Helsing," would direct. Then came word the script had to be finished in seven weeks because of the writers strike. Then came word that Sommers was fired in mid-shoot because the studio (Paramount) was so unhappy with how the movie was turning out.

And then there were those awful trailers.

All things considered, it's hard to think of a non-sequel that entered theaters with more baggage than "GI Joe."

So how is the actual movie?

It's okay! It's gloriously, spectacularly, shockingly okay!

I mean, it's a noisy, kinetic, emotionally retarded series of action sequences, but hey, it's a movie based on a toy, and to compare apples to apples, it's much better than the first "Transformers." It's certainly the movie Paramount was trying to get into theaters. In that sense, "Joe" is reminiscent of Paramount's other big gamble this summer, "Star Trek." The product may not be flawless -- or even memorable -- but it gets the breezy tone of schmaltzy fun just right.

So, down to brass tacks. Here's what's good about "GI Joe":

Sienna Miller's Baroness, a slinky bad girl who makes a nicely mysterious appearance during an early -- you guessed it! -- action sequence. The Baroness carries the plot for the first half of the movie (as far as Joe can tell, the Baroness IS Cobra), and perhaps because of this, the first half is the best half.

Also good is Rachel Nichols in her yes-I-am-that-good-looking breakout as Scarlett. A red-headed vixen with an attitude that's all business, Scarlett attracts the eye even when she's on-screen with a crowd. Maybe that's just me, though.

The ninja fights are sufficiently fun. You did know there were going to be ninja fights, didn't you? One of Joe's best fighters is the mute martial artist Snake Eyes. It turns out he's the adoptive brother of the evil Cobra ninja Stormshadow. Like everything in this movie, there's something ridiculous yet cool to the idea that a special forces unit's top soldier would disdain firearms in favor of a sword and some throwing stars.

The globe-trotting nature of the story is a welcome nod to the old cartoon as well as a good way of establishing franchise identity. Fights take place in nearly every climate Earth offers. The sequel is going to have a hard time coming up with a new arena to stage a battle.

In a movie full of action, the chase sequence through Paris deserves special mention. Director Sommers pulls off a frenetic fight/chase on an epic scale without losing track of where things are in relation to each other, which is the ultimate test of any action sequence, especially one as crazy and reckless as this one.

So what's weak?

Um, let's start with the theoretical protagonist "Duke," played by bland hero-type Channing Tatum. Duke is supposed to have had a previous relationship with the Baroness, but this never rings true because Sienna Miller's character has a thousand times more charm than Tatum's. Furthermore, Miller comes off as highly intelligent (not saying she is! I read the tabloids too!) whereas Tatum's default facial expression is a blank stare that seems to indicate he couldn't spell SAT, let alone score in the top one percent, as is alleged.

Because this is an origin story, the future Cobra Commander, played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt (a big-time rising star), toils in the background. He's got the raspy-voiced overacting of Cobra Commander down pat, so it'll be fun to see him get more screen time in the sequel.

Also hurting the movie is a third act explosion-fest that runs too long and has very little focus. The great thing about the finale in the original Star Wars (the attack on the Death Star) was that we knew what the rebels were trying to do: they were trying to fire a volley of torpedoes into a certain exhaust pipe, which would result in the destruction of the Death Star. There is no such organizing principle governing the attack on Cobra's underwater headquarters, so there's lots of aimless running around and shooting of stuff, which gets old fairly quick.

Ultimately the good outweighs the bad in "GI Joe," which is something I'm surprised to conclude, given all the behind-the-scenes drama leading up to the movie.

So... Yo Joe!

Sorta.

SCORE:

How Accomplished: 57/100

How Much I Enjoyed: 67/100

(Read Less...)

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Solider is one of the few jobs that make sense to a six-year-old. If your noun can be a verb – if your job implies an action – it has kid-appeal. That’s why Army Men are popular at playtime and Accountant Men stay in their original packaging. Accountancy, like most office work, is a profession that ill-suits six-year-olds. Sitting at a desk can only engage the mind for so long. But to be in the army! Think of it the way a small person does: a) you shout; b) you shoot at stuff; c) everyone gets a gun. No wonder G.I. Joe is catnip for kids. The new movie may even reacquaint a few office drones with their inner child.

It begins with two guys called Duke and Ripcord. They are Soldiers. The kind of guys Demi Moore was thinking of in A Few Good Men when she said, “They stand on a wall. And they say ‘Nothing’s gonna hurt you tonight. Not on my watch’.” Men of honour: memorial-ready. Duke and Ripcord are assigned to guard a Top Secret weapons convoy. But they’re ambushed! The evil “Cobra” organisation (which you’d think would be an acronym) wants the Top Secret weapons. Outgunned and perhaps slightly turned-on by their enemies (one of Cobra’s operatives is a former girlfriend of Duke); the boys are saved by the intervention of G.I. Joe, the most special of Special Ops.

As someone who watched G.I. Joe: The Movie in 1987 and promptly forgot most of it, I can’t claim to have known much going in, but G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is easier for non-converts than the Transformersmovies. Embracing dualism, the essence of the Joe universe is that for every goodie there must be a baddie (who will dress according to who they’re supposed to fight). So the good girl must fight the bad girl, the good ninja must fight the bad ninja, and only General Hawk can fight Cobra Commander. The good guys are the ones trying to stop the bad guys. The bad guys (in a detail Carl Jung would have savoured) are the ones who wear masks.

A typical action sequence in G.I. Joe involves swords, guns, lasers, zombies, robots, explosions and a pretty red-haired girl. It’s made to a small boy’s priorities, but that’s not to say it isn’t fun. At its manic best,G.I. Joe captures the fervent excitement of waving plastic figurines at each other – the fate of the world being decided on your bedroom carpet – as Duke and his band of heroes go pow-pow-pow and the bad guys fall down. When the Eiffel Tower crashes into the Seine after being partially consumed by nanomites (they’re bad – does the rest matter?), the scene has far more to do with the joy of fireworks than international terrorism.

Channing Tatum plays Duke like a guy with a talking pull-string in his back, but it would be tough to see any other way to play him. He’s a toy. His back story is an assembly line in China. The love of his life is called The Baroness. She wears heels into battle. Duke’s friends are a blind ninja and a buxom red-head who shoots guys with a crossbow. They work out of an underground bunker in the Sahara desert. To accuse Tatum of bad acting is like accusing R2D2 of not beeping convincingly. Ok, Sienna Miller has more fun as The Baroness, but her costume is a rubber cat-suit – and she knows karate. When Miller stops in the middle of a gun-fight to compliment a woman’s shoes, she deserves her own Oscar category.

Sadly, women have no interest in G.I. Joe. Even Sienna probably rolled her eyes as she read of how The Baroness learned karate from an evil ninja called Storm Shadow. To women, G.I. Joe is like a farting contest; mortifying, pre-adolescent. When a man says, “Do you want to watch a G.I. Joe movie?” a woman feels let down. Not that she’s wrong to think this way. G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra would not be best described as “adult”. What I would argue, however, is that if men (and six-year-olds) can find something to whoop about in G.I. Joe, maybe girls should try it. This movie dares you not to have fun.

Movie Review: G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is the type of summer blockbuster that is fated to be panned by critics, regardless of whether it actually deserves to be reviled.  In my humble opinion, if you know what to expect with this type of film (and come on, you should if you go to see it), it’s not actually all that bad.

First of all, it should be noted that while I may or may not have played with the Hasbro action figures (which may or may not have been cheap rip-offs) when I was younger, I am not very familiar with the G.I. Joe ’story’, if there is one.  Nevertheless, that isn’t very important to this movie.

I won’t reveal the plot because there’s really no point – take a guess and you’ll probably be close.  You don’t need me to tell you that the film revolves around the ‘Joes’ who are trying to stop their evil enemies from world domination.  Trust me, it’s predictable – even the so-called twists are.  It’s also likely to be the first of many G.I. Joe films to come, depending on the success of this first one.

Anyway, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is pretty much what you’d expect from a film of this kind.  It has a superb cast: Dennis Quaid, Channing Tatum, Sienna Miller, Marlon Wayans, Christopher Eccleston, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Jonathan Pryce, Arnold Vosloo (the Mummy!), Brendan Fraser (cameo) and Ray Park (Darth Maul!).  It also features some sub-par acting, at least by these actors’ standards.

Also as expected, the film is extremely loud and relentless, with non-stop action and all types of battle scenes, from the ground to the sky to the sea, from hand-to-hand combat to exhilarating sword fights, from bullets to hi-tech blasters to ninja stars, and of course the obligatory car chase scenes – you name it, you got it.  All of these sequences are filmed with the subtlety of a sledge-hammer, and while some of it was exciting, it still felt like something was missing.  Perhaps it was the predictability, the apparent invincibility of the characters, or maybe it was just a lack of heart.

The special effects go without saying.  It’s seamless and often eye-popping.  However, it is the stuff that doesn’t rely on special effects – the hand-t0-hand and particularly the sword fights – that really steal the show.  They are meticulously choreographed and there’s no over-use of quick-cut editing.  Oh, and there’s also the cool technological gadgets, weapons and machinery.  If you can suspend all disbelief then you may think they are pretty cool.

So far so good.  Unfortunately, as expected, the good parts also come hand in hand with the appalling dialogue, the cheesy one-liners and horrible jokes that only generate laughs because they’re so bad.  Cringeworthy bad.

There you have it.  G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is what it is.  As long as you don’t expect something else then you may find it quite enjoyable, though even then, it has its limitations.

3 stars out of 5!

(Read Less...)

PJM

Last updated: 2010-01-06 22:30:13 by user04

GI Joe : The Rise of Cobra

I was not jumping up and down when the first GI Joe movie posters came out. Do not get me wrong, I am a fan of GI Joe, but I was thinking they would make a botched up job. It is a relief they proved me wrong.

All characters, Joes and Cobras, were given ample exposure in the film. Not unlike the X-Men films, were Wolverine obviously gets more screen time and dialogue. The movie is almost like a prequel because it depicts the history of the main characters. The characters are very interesting, both for a newbie or a fan (but more so for the fan).

I honestly do not find Sienna Miller hot but this movie is the exception. She takes a very different persona as the svelte brunette villain Baroness. Rachel Nichols is not bad either playing the resident GI Joe redhead Scarlett O’Hara. Hot hot hot!

Ray Park did an excellent job portraying everyone’s favourite GI Joe character, Snake Eyes. I feel Channing Tatum though was a miscast as the All American Hero, Duke. He is not the leader-type of a person.

Yes, the action sequences are over-the-top, but if you are making a movie based on a toy, it is only consistent to have those sorts of scenes.

In the course of the movie, you will sometimes notice a few crappy CGI’s here and there, but I think it is forgivable. They may have faced limited budgets, but in the end it is the actors and story that mattered.

It is but inevitable that the movie GI Joe: Rise of Cobra will be compared to Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Both characters are from the 80’s era. Both movies came from a very popular toy line. Both are loaded with generous servings of CGI. In terms of special effects, Transformers has the advantage; because Michael Bay has perfected the craft. Unfortunately, a movie is not all special effects. For me GI Joe wins hands-down only because the story is both logical and entertaining.

The ending of the movie has closure; however, you would most likely observe the movie was all along neatly preparing the stage for the sequel, which I hope is going to be bigger.

A very worthwhile diversion and a fitting end to the US Summer Blockbuster season. A definite must-see. Now you know and knowing is half the battle. (Cue slow motion walk).

Last updated: 2009-08-16 09:52:43 by edthehead

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Michael Bay’s Transformers marked the beginning. Now the next movies about boys’ favorite action toys gets its own movie. And as I expected after seeing the trailer: This movie is so shitty, trashy and filled with tons of special effects, the movie is kind of good again; a summer blockbuster popcorn movie nobody needs, with actors who are not only miscast, but their roles are very boring and their respective actors bored. Maybe this movie was not a good idea to make, because it has zero value. Nothing new in story, characters, effects; this is just a million-dollar project of a production firm called Hasbro, a once good director named Stephen Sommers (who was responsible for the acceptable good The Mummy summer blockbusters), which completely fails in the cinema, because nobody is interested in a Transformers copy without the Transformers, instead with high-tech soldiers, who defy physics and gravity and try to make the world better while killing some bad terrorists, who want to rule the world. And just because Hasbro plans to do some advertisement for their toys. When is the next group of toys coming with a movie on their feet? And I seriously don’t hope they are planning a sequel to this.
Okay, when I am honest, I want to see a sequel; I want to see that writers and producers are learning from their mistakes and actually make a better movie. With less special effects, better actors and a sense of a good story. Because the typical and stereotype “Maniac seeks to rule the world” is older than James Bond and more boring than the sac of rice falling from a patio in China. Or trying to be simple: horrible movie, but good movie. You don’t understand? Me neither… I try to simplify the simple story in less than fifty words: There is a secret agency with super-soldiers and there are stolen warheads. Super soldiers try to find the warheads and stop a maniac from taking over the world. Meanwhile said super soldiers have some difficulties with their mission and run after the bad people, the warheads and a lost love.
Damn, 51 words.
The movie is way too overrated, even though the ads for this movie were not that many. I barely saw the trailer in cinemas and I never saw any billboards. Maybe the bad critics of the movie are unwarranted, too, because you get from this movie what you want to see. You don’t go to see Transformers, when you are looking for characters, logic and a romantically sweet love story. You see it for the action, for the big booms and for the simple story, which is only a reason for things to blow up in a spectacular way. It worked in the first Transformers, it worked barely in the second Transformers. It didn’t work in G.I. Joe.
The story of the movie is basically the “serious” version of Team America: World Police with a bit from every military movie you know and lots of patriotism, cheesy dialogs, stupid twists and a falling Eiffel Tower. It begins with a flashback of the year 1641 in France and jumps forward in time to our present. I had to ask myself what the flashback wanted to tell me; not only didn’t I see any connections with the “story from the past”, but when these connections are shining behind the clouds for a little bit, then they are completely useless. It works way better without the Man in the Iron Mask copy. And I know this was part of the G.I Joe history, with its comics and the animated TV series. But for the movie it was just a waste of time. As it was most part of the movie.
Let’s make it clear: This movie wasn’t made for back-stories of the characters, for a meaningful story without plot holes, for getting the B class actors out there. The main reason for the movie was Hasbro selling some action toys. It is like a 170 million dollar campaign for a classic G.I. Joe 12 inch soldier, trying to wow the kids again and let the parents pay for action figures, which the kids won’t see again, when they start with senior high school. And it worked; G.I. Joe is somehow between a high-tech summer popcorn blockbuster nobody wanted to see after the opening weekend (as of Oct. 11, the domestic box office with estimated 150 million dollars is still under the 175 million dollar production budget) and a big commercial clip advertising the toys and lots of “Get recruited by the military and you’ll be the hero the country needs right now”. The characters were build around the action scenes and the story around the big bangs.
Of course, the plot holes are so conspicuous you actually go blind seeing them: Warheads need to be weaponized while zapped with lasers for almost a minute? Our hero soldiers standing on a polar ice cap in the middle of the coldest place on Earth, wearing simple jeans and a pretty thin jacket? Lots of explosions with big fireballs under the ice cap in the water? Well, maybe for now I am an unhappy film critic who is highlighting all the plot holes…
The actors in G.I. Joe were probably bored while making the movie. Main hero Duke (Channing Tatum) doesn’t have one single face expression to offer; his BFF and soldier partner Ripchord (Marlon Wayans) only a vehicle for the cheesy and supposed-to-be funny oneliners; Ripchord’s future girlfriend and redhead Scarlett O’Hara (Rachel Nichols) is just the hot bitch on the good side, while Duke’s ex-girlfriend Anastasia (Sienna Miller) wears sexy leather, cool sunglasses and is very bad. With The Doctor (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) and James McCullen (Christopher Ecclestone), we have two very cheesy bad boys, who just want one thing: masturbating while sitting on the throne of the world. The one wants to be the boss of all science of the world, the other one wants to be the boss of the world (it is pretty much the same in my eyes). And while Mr. Eko… ehm, Heavy Duty (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje); Snake Eyes (Ray Park) and General Hawk (Dennis Quaid) are responsible for the unintentionally funny last battle, the good fight sequences (I liked the fights between Snake Eyes and his white-clothed brother Storm Shadow [Byung-hun Lee], especially their fight in one of the flashbacks, when they were beating the shit out of each other while being “normal” kids), and the cheesy general dialogs, the bad people are actually really dumb, when it comes to taking over the world. Because nobody stands against the G.I. Joes in this time of present. And nobody stands against the new hot fighting bitches Sienna Miller and Rachel Nichols, who are definitely on some watchlists of future action summer blockbusters. Hopefully they are.
After a while it is obvious that G.I. Joe won’t be more than that, and this is what I was expecting after I saw the trailer: nothing, an action-based science fiction flick, a good vs. bad story, cheesy characters and dialogs, incredible bored actors, and all in all a movie without a real purpose. The special effects seem unfinished, the stories stolen (the scenes in Paris alone scream for a Team America: World Police rewatch), the action unstoppable. And, seriously, the action scenes are well done – at least this is something, Stephen Sommers can do really good. Just an action summer flick. Nothing more, probably way more less.
Better than Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen? Maybe, but I liked it more, when alien robots are beating the circuitries out of each other; soldier fights are just plain after all. After all I have to say that I love this movie, because I hate it so much.

G.I Joe: The Rise of Cobra on mralphafreak's blog

(Read Less...)

Last updated: 2010-03-19 08:15:47 by mralphafreak

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Yo, Joe! Yes, I was one of those little boys in the 80s that had every G.I. Joe action figure and never missed an episode (along with Transformers, He-Man, Thundercats, etc.) Having said that, I have to admit that I wasn’t counting down the days for G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra like I was with both Transformers and Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.  Although I’ve always been more of a Transformers fan, this was more a fact of me not really being a fan of military movies, which is part of what I expected going in this afternoon.
Yes, it was a military flick, but unlike so many others, this one actually was fun to watch. As a matter of fact, that goes for the movie as a whole. Stephen Sommers did an excellent job capturing the spirit of the original cartoon, even if he did deviate from the source material a bit too much for my taste. While the rest of Hollywood is busy trying to make the most dark, dramatic, and boring flicks, sommers remembers that movies are first and foremost about entertaining the audience.
I’m not going to sit here and erect a shrineto the man just yet, though. As I said, he deviated too far from the source material for my taste. Many of the origins were changed. Similar to the original Transformers,the characters that were chosen aren’t necessarily well known to you average, pardon the pun, Joe. Sure, we all know Destro, Baroness, Scarlett, Snake Eyes, ans Storm Shadow, and some may even know General Hawk. Howver, Heavy Duty is from the comics, if I’m not mistaken and not as well known. Ripcord is supposed to have been a white guy (you can make an issue about that if you want, but I don’t see the need).  Breaker I vaguely remember, but not sure how big of a role he played. Cover Girl is in the film, but she’s nothing more than Hawk’s secretary, who gets killed early in the film and we never learn her name. Personally, I think Heavy Duty should have been Roadblock, or at least if they insisted on using Marlon Wayans, he could have been Roadblock. Roadblock was  such a major character in the cartoon, it makes no sense to not have him in here, unless they’re holding him for the sequel. Along those same lines, you can include Flint and Lady Jay. As far as Cobra goes, I think they did a good job. Perhaps they could have brought in the twins, Tomax and Xamot if anyone, but that would have been just overkill. Baroness, Destro, Storm Shadow, Zartan, and Cobra Commander worked just fine.
I’ve made it perfectly clear that I have no love for CGI. Using it for giant robots or spaceships and stuff is fine, but when it is pretty much the driving force of the film, then there are some issues that need to be looked at. This is the case with the film. There is a ton of action, but very few scenes that don’t encompass CG at some point. It came off as a bit of overkill. Now, I will go so far as to say that the scene with the nano-mites devouring the Eiffel Tower is a sight to behold, and I doubt it could have been done without CG, but other action scenes didn’t require the use of CG, scuch as when Duke and Ripcord are chasing the Baroness and company through Paris. This could have very well been done with some careful camera work and highly trained stun doubles. Maybe it’s just me, though.
The story is not a bad one. Could it be that the writers actually took some time to write a decent plot? It sure seems like it, but as good as the story is, the acting falls short. Don’t get me wrong, its quite obvious that they had fun making this move and wanted to do a good job with their characters, but they just didn’t pull it off. I’ve seen better acting in elementary school plays. If they wanted to make a flick that was all about the action, then they should have cut back on the dialogue and done more action. It would have diverted the attention away from how bad this film was acted.
Yes, the action scenes are great. The best of which has to be the fights with Storm Shadow and Snake Eyes. These are epic and save for some changes to Storm Shadow’s character, faithful to the cartoon. If I didn’t know better, I’d say that hte powers that be behind this film were fans of one or the other. Strange thing, though, is that these are the only ones that have a full back story. Yeah, Duke, Baroness, Cobra Commander, and to s lesser extent Destro and Ripcord, have stories, but none as complex or as well explained to us as this one is.
As a guy, I’d be remiss if I didn’t say something about the hotness of the Baroness and Scarlett. Played by Sienna Miller and Rachel Nichols, respectively, some creative padding and wigs here and there turn them fully into the characters they play. Personally, I swing a little more toward Scarlett, which is weird because in the cartoon I always loved Baroness.
So, the critics are torn on this one. Some are loving the action and fun, but tearing every other aspect of it apart. However, those of us that actually know what we want to see in a movie seem to love it. Personally, I liked it. I was a little disappointed and expected a bit more. At one point, a though came to my head, Michale Bay would be awesome as director of this film. Think about it, he has ah ard on for the military and loves to blow stuff up. It would be right up his alley.
It is obvious that they expect this to be the beginning of a franchise. I hope that we get more and they they bring in more characters that make sense. Hell, they could bring in Sgt. Slaughter or William “The Refrigerator” Perry (both special edition Joes, Sarge was actually a character in the cartoon). What did ultimately think of this film? It is worth seeing, especially in theaters, so that you can get the full effect. Of course, make sure you’re not sitting next to a family of redneck children who can’t sit still and keep going in and about of the theater, as well as babies crying all over the place. When this comes out on DVD, I’ll be able to know for certain if I like or love it. You should go see it for yourself.

http://thankyounetflix.wordpress.com